Along the way, she has met children affected by cancer, especially girls who, in addition to the serious illness, have also suffered from hair loss, something that can have a particularly strong impact on the self-image of teenagers.
Leukaemia is one of the diseases that takes a long time to cure, and this brings with it one of the most painful side-effects for children - hair loss from receiving cytostatics. Boys sometimes cope with this a little more easily, but for girls, especially in the vulnerable teenage years, this loss is often extremely difficult. Hair is not only part of one's appearance, it is also part of one's identity. Girls' self-esteem often plummets with the loss of their hair, and the feeling of being different can become an unbearable burden.
At the oncology ward of the Paediatric Clinic in Ljubljana, where her son was also treated, Karmen met some girls who wanted to have their hair back like their classmates. They were buying artificial wigs and trying out different designs in order to be accepted, less visible and less vulnerable.
"When you watch girls crying every day, retreating into themselves, comparing fake wigs and wondering which one fits them better, these scenes stay with you," she says. And that's when the decision was made; she would donate her hair, about 45 centimetres long, to those in need.
"I believe that this action will make one little girl very happy. I believe that my gesture will change a girl's life and give her back the confidence that her illness stole from her for a moment."
She donated her hair to the Foundation Little princess trust, which creates natural hair wigs for girls and women who go without them due to medical treatments. They usually need about seven centimetres of length for one wig, which allows them to weave the hair into a wig.
But she was not alone in this story.
Her friend Romina Škare, the owner of a hair salon in Croatia, offered to do Karmen's hair for free, from the preparation to the cut. "In doing so, she also contributed her piece to the mosaic of this story; her time, her hands and her heart."
For two and a half years, Karmen has been having her hair regularly taken care of by hairdresser Tina from the hairdressing salon Tina in Cerklje. Every week, she entrusted her with washing and caring for her hair to keep it strong, nourished and ready for something bigger.
Karmen also emphasises the deeper meaning of long hair: 'Historically, long hair is a symbol of femininity, strength and grace, which is why it is so important for girls. But we have to learn that true beauty is not in the strand of hair, but in the energy we carry within."
You can find the Facebook group Project Onkorun by medical students. They are the ones who are responsible for spreading the hair donation story.
"I wouldn't have known about all this if I hadn't met Brigita and Zlata Pentljica Institute, children with cancer. Her daughter Mija followed my son after the events and admired how he managed to keep his energy, calm and relaxed despite his illness. Those sparkles in a child's eyes change you." Mrs Brigita Smrekar is an ambassador of the Foundation Little princess trust for Slovenia and Croatia It offers free wigs to children and adolescents up to 24 years of age who have cancer.
When Karmen looks in the mirror today, she sees more than just a new hairstyle. She sees a symbol of transformation and strength. "My outer appearance reflects my inner state. I have never put much stock in what others think of me. You can never be everyone's cup of tea. But it hurts me when I see girls who are afraid that just because they don't have hair, no one will want them. I try to explain to them that whoever likes them will like them because of their energy."
"Yes, you have to take care of your hair and invest years in its care, but hair grows. And in a few years you can repeat the story. In this crazy world, values have been lost, but acts of the heart and small gestures still connect us."
When you experience such an ordeal, either alone or as someone who accompanies a child on a thorny path, many things change in you. "How insignificant everyday worries become, like who will be first at the traffic lights, how the day will go at work, or which sugar you will choose with your coffee. You realise that these are small things. You only feel the real things when you are in an accident. That's when you need someone to cheer you on and give you positive energy and confidence."
In moments like these, Carmen gets back to the point: "Sometimes it's hard to admit that other people's opinions don't matter. What matters is your personal satisfaction. It's the inner peace that lets you know that what you've done is the right decision. And you do it not for others, but for yourself; for your own little piece of happiness and pride. And if you can help someone or make someone happy, that's even better."
"I did it for myself, for my well-being... And for her, who will walk more confidently on her path in life thanks to my gesture," Karmen concludes.
I am grateful for such warm-hearted people who help!
Maja Grošelj, 1. 7. 2025
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